///I figure she was always a Mal-type nurturer, ///

except Mal pretends (to himself even) not to be!


///very independent but also longing for a true family, ///

which i think she found, come HOG

///possibly because she came from a neglected home.///

yeah... could be - and in the real world things to play out many more times than once, they become patterns - so maybe tht's what happened during her guild time, and like you say, mayybe Nandi woke up to herself later, when she was on her own...